Fat Girl Visions

Two of my clients have arrived early for Phat Camp. We are having a great time and talking about all sorts of interesting things. One topic that came up so much last night was Fat Girl Thinking (FGT).

If you read my blog regularly you know what this is. FGT is a place all of us visit regularly in our minds that tells us that we are fat, not worthy, ugly, heavier than we think we are, doesn’t allow us to be happy with our choices, and basically is the chubby, little devil sitting on our shoulder. Our little devil holds a big sugar stick instead of a pitch fork, though.

FGT is one of those things that naturally happens when you are losing weight or have lost your weight. It takes FOREVER to go away. Honestly, there are days I think I have it licked and other days that I feel at square one with it. The key for me is to remind myself that it is “just thinking” and it is not “reality”. When it happens I go to my PNP client site and talk about it. I journal what I’m thinking, why it’s wrong, and essentially talk myself off that ledge.

The other key is accepting the fact that there will always be a fat girl inside me. She lived with me most of my life and there is no way to ever erase her. She definitely gets quieter as time goes on, but I don’t want her to ever go away. For all the times she makes me doubt my new body and my self-confidence, she also makes me drag my lazy butt to the gym on the days I really need to go. Yes, even I have days that I want to forget working out and eating right. More than you know.

That’s one aspect of FGT we forget about. Sometimes she’s right! There are times that we start nibbling, shortening our workouts, or saying the dreaded, “I eat so much better than most people or than I used to…I can have that.”Our little pal starts piping up. This is exactly when we need to listen to her. We could be falling into our old habits and ways of thinking and she’s actually trying to help us…she just does it in an ugly way. I mean, it would be nice if she would say, “You really should workout today; you aren’t that tired so buck up,” versus, “You are such a fatty; I can’t believe you are so lazy that you are going to stay in bed this morning!” That’s just ole fat girl…curt, rude, and in your face.

Everyone needs to identify when she makes sense and when she’s just being a grouch. Most of the time she’s grouchy and messing with your mind. Sometimes, though, she’s tough loving you and you need to listen.

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Workout: Back with trainer. We’ll be doing the usual…Pull-ups, some sort of row, and this week we’ll do biceps.

Food Journal:

B – Oatmeal and Fage
S – Post workout Shake (choco/banana)
L – Ham sand wrap, carrots and hummus
S – Protein Bar and milk
D – Pasta with Turkey Marinara
S – Fage with PP